Stop asking what's wrong with you. What if what's wrong with you is actually what's right with you? Laura NaughtonEvery night before I go to sleep I write a list of at least five things for which I am grateful. One item, which I write every night but doesn't count as one of my 'five' is: I am grateful for being me.
I wouldn't want to be anyone else.
Not because someone else is wrong. Nope. I wouldn't want to be someone else because being me is the best place for me to learn how to be more of me.
I've come a long way.
There have been times in my life when I have wanted to be someone else. Or at least, to have traits and characteristics of someone else. Perhaps someone taller. Someone with a size six shoe, or someone with a sweeter voice, a more eloquent pen, or simply someone who is more self-assured.
What's wrong with me is what is right with me.
Wrong and right are simply judgement words. Remove the judgement and I'm ok, just the way I am.
I love to dance. Now, I don't dance like Dame Margot Fonteyn or Martha Graham. I will probably never be on a world-class stage, applauded by millions. But I still love to dance. And I can still dance out-loud, with full body motion, just for the love of it.
I love to ask questions. There are those who will tell you -- I ask too many questions. Does that make me wrong? Nope. It's just part of me. My questions are how I learn about other people. How I learn about me and the world around me. As long as I am asking from a loving heart, my questions will not cause pain or harm. As long as I am asking to understand, not to judge, my integrity remains in tact, and I am in balance.
It all depends on my state of being.
When I am insecure, what I do, who I am being reflects my inner being. My lack of accepting myself exactly the way I am and not loving myself for all I'm worth, will create friction in the world around me.
When I am In Love. Standing firmly in the glow of wonder that emanates from my inner knowing of loving myself exactly the way I am, I create a world of wonder. When I am In Love, love is what I reflect to the world. In Love, right and wrong take a back seat to authenticity and congruity. In love, love is all there is. In love, all things are possible, including loving myself exactly the way I am.
Doesn't mean I don't have traits that don't work for me anymore. I still do. In love, those traits take are overshadowed by what does work for me. What I put my attention on grows stronger in m life.
When I focus on acting with integrity in all things, integrity becomes what I focus on. Answering the question, what's the right thing to do in a given situation, becomes easy. The right thing is what will fill me with the sense of being a woman of integrity. As I strengthen my memory muscle, being a woman of integrity becomes my second nature.
When I focus on asking, what's wrong with me, I put my attention on what I don't want in my life. And what I don't want steals the show as I become tangled up in the curtains of self-doubt, self-denigration and confusion.
I don't want to be confused. I want to be a woman of worth.
So much more powerful to focus on what I want, on what is right with me rather than what is wrong.
The power is in where I put my attention.
So, here's a challenge for you today.
Divide a sheet of paper with a line down the middle. On the left side of the page, Write: I am... Underneath, quickly write a list of five things you consider 'wrong' with you today.
Take a deep breath.
On the right side of the page, Write, I am.... and underneath, write a list of who you are when you aren't considering yourself to be the five things on the other side of the page. For example, if you wrote: I am... slow to learn new ideas, on the left side of the page, on the right side, your answer could be: I am... persistent. When learning new ideas I never give up.
For every negative, write the positive.
Once you've made your list, focus on the right side of the page for the rest of your day. Whenever one of the 'negative' thoughts comes slithering in, banish it with a laugh and a shake of your head and read out loud the positive. If you're feeling particularly brave, give your whole body a shake so that you can 'shake the sillies out'.
Focusing on the negative doesn't serve any purpose other than to make us feel 'bad' about ourselves. And feeling bad will not get anyone more of what they want in life.
Go ahead, give it a try. And if your first thought is, "I don't do this kind of thing", or "I don't have time", write at the top of your list on the left side, I make excuses for myself (or whatever fits you). And on the right side, write: I am courageous. I am willing to excuse myself for being hesitant by letting go of my fear and giving myself the chance to try something new (or whatever fits you).
Negative or positive -- they are both judgements. Getting out of the way of our own judgements makes room for us to be all we're meant to be, without fear that who we are is less than who we could be if only....
If only, the sky were green and birds couldn't fly.
If only, water didn't flow and the earth were square.
Nothing wrong with who we are. It's our thinking that gets in the way of our greatness.
Do a great thing today. Give yourself the chance to take a look at your thinking without judging who you are.
The question is: Are you willing to give yourself a chance to feel your greatness rising from the inside out?
PS. Thanks CW for the quote. Love it! You add sunshine to my day.