Friday, June 5, 2009

Running through the pain

Beware that you do not lose the substance by grasping at the shadow. Aesop
In the ebb and flow of life, there is always that place where water meets land, land meets water and the sands are stirred.

Yesterday, as I drove to a meeting I was thinking about the turmoil in my life, about the ebb and flow of my emotions, beliefs and behaviours. About the stirring up of my thinking where it washes away the residue of my disbelief that I can have the life of my dreams, right now in this moment, by living up to my highest good and letting go of my fixed belief it has to hurt if it's worth anything in my life.

Several years ago I ran a marathon. Twenty-six miles (plus some odd feet which were apparently added on many years ago to accommodate the finish line passing before the Queen's box). About six weeks before the race, I pulled a hamstring. Ouch! Having spent months training I was determined to complete the run, and I did. My hamstring was not happy. I was. It was a great accomplishment for me. However, the cost was significant, it took several years for my hamstring to heal and my running days were inhibited.

What struck me yesterday as I remembered my determination to complete that race was the fact that to do it, I had to, as they say in runner's circles, 'run through the pain'.

What if, my mind wondered, I am constantly living that belief? Continually running through the pain, looking for 'the wall' every marathon runner inevitably hits somewhere in their career.

What if in my belief there's always a wall to hit, I am limiting myself to a life of pain?

What if I wash away my limiting belief and stir up my thinking to embrace a new belief system? It's not about proving I can run through the pain, it's about running the best race of my life in this moment. There's no 'wall' to hit. No pain to be gained. Just beautiful thin air to move through with ease and grace.

What kind of a difference would that make in my life?

See, I have a belief system that says, "I can do anything." Question is: Do I want to? Must I? Is it necessary. Best. Right?

I can BE committed to DO what it takes to HAVE what I want -- but when the attainment of what I want on this physical plane does not align with my highest good, I am creating pain to run through as I hit the wall of my spirit's resistance to being less than its birthright.

The universe is filled with limitless possibilities. It is eternal bliss.

In my scrambling to make it happen by proving I can run through anything, I have inadvertently put walls up around my inner peace and happiness by causing myself unnecessary pain.

Inner peace and happiness are my birthright. They are eternal states of bliss. It is my struggle to attain them that separates me from living within their flow. Accepting what is in this moment, breathing deeply into my spirit, moving with grace and ease through 'the now', eliminates the need to hit the wall of my resistance to living freely, surrendering my ego and giving into love.

The question is: Are you constantly looking for the wall, running through the pain to find your happiness on the other side? Are you willing to move with grace and ease with the ebb and flow of this moment washing into the next?

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

LG,

Is is pain, or are you grieving the loss of some expectations (forget for the moment whether or not they were reasonable ones to have) that cannot be realized?

Your determination and grit so often well disguised beneath the surface is showing. Good for you.

Take care of you - it's a full time job, and others will take care of themselves too ..

Have a great friday

Mark

S L M Moss said...

Hi Louise,

Check your Facebook :)

Love you lots!!!

Sarah

M.L. Gallagher said...

Hi Mark -- thanks for your support! Good question! :)

Sarah -- I have a virus -- or something- around my FAcebook and can't get in. :(

I'll be at Choices all weekend and will hopefully see you there!

Hugs

Louise