Friday, September 18, 2009

You are my beloved. My beloved is me.

You are my beloved and my beloved is me. A prayer
It is Friday. My friend B.A. arrived last night on her way to visit her family in the southern part of the province. I am always in awe of B.A. Her commitment to her family. To doing the right thing, even when it hurts, in spite of how difficult or challenging. To turning up and supporting those she loves with her heart and soul and energy and love. Like my sister, J.T., B.A. is committed to being and giving her best even when those she serves are looking the other way, or unable to accept with open arms the gifts she shares so generously from her heart.

It is Friday. A day to 'clean up', restore, tidy up, set straight, those things left undone throughout the week.

It is Friday. A day to give thanks for all the gifts that appeared upon my path. A day for gratitude and celebration of all I am, all I have, all I have been given.

When I was a little girl, Friday was the day we ate fish. It was also the day we knelt in our living room, rosary in hand, and prayed together. I loved those moments with my mother. Rosary beads clicking, a candle burning in front of the statue of Mary that stood on a corner table in our living room as she whispered the Our Father and then ten Hail Mary's. Round and round the Rosary she would go and with each 'decade', a new Mystery was announced and then, the Our Father and ten Hail Mary's.

There was a grace to those times. A sense of ritual. A serenity. A predictability.

As a child, my mind often wandered. Sometimes, I resented the intrusion of prayer into my play. The need to get down on my knees to pray to a God who seemed too distant, and so harsh.

Yet, with every Hail Mary, every bead clicked-off, there was a connection to something greater than this human existence, something spiritually connected beyond the corporeal realm of our daily living.

And while I no longer pray the Rosary every Friday, the power of prayer continues to resonate within me. As a little girl, I prayed for sunshine on the weekend. For a red rubber ball at Christmas. For my mommy to not be so sad. My daddy not so angry. I prayed for my brother to teach me how to ride a bike. My sister to give me her favourite doll that I coveted.

As a child, my prayers were simple wishes designed to bring me what I wanted in my life that moment, that day, that hour. Sometimes I prayed I could be a 'good girl' and not make every one so unhappy. Or that I could have wings and fly away to some other home where I belonged and didn't feel so out of place. As a child, my prayers were always focused on me, myself and I. On what I wanted in a world that seemed too big and too scary for me to understand.

Today, my prayers are not focused on bringing to me what I wish for. They are about creating more of what I want in life -- not the tangible effects of more money, or a larger house, or a bigger car -- but rather, those intangibles of peace of mind, serenity, authenticity.

Today, my prayers are sent up into the Universe, Divinely inspired to create a world of love and joy all around me. I see my prayers as the stone dropped into a pond, rippling out and creating waves of beauty in the world out there beyond my wildest dreams.

Today, the power is not in my prayers, it is in the spiritual connectedness I feel when I take a breath, allow my being to settle into the seat of my belly, deeper and deeper like a leaf drifting to the ground, as I connect to all that is Divine, all that is One within me and the universe around me.

Today is Friday. I give thanks for a week of abundance. A week of joy and laughter. For good friends and good conversation. For family and love and the knowing that I am not alone. I am part of a universe of love that supports me and lifts me up to my highest good.

Today is Friday. Thank you for being here with me. For being part of my circle of brilliance.

Today is Friday and I pray you touch the fire in your belly and fan its flames with love and joy and laughter. I pray your brilliance casts light into the darkest corners as you illuminate the world with your laughter and tears, love and joy. I pray we shine together; for you are my beloved and my beloved is me.

The question is: Are you willing to shine?


S L M Moss said...

and yet, there are also times when it is okay to ask for what we need and want from God. :)

Love you.
Thank you for your words today. I needed to hear the accolades to your friend.

Hugs and beans.
Hope to talk to you soon.

Anonymous said...


I'd like to re-publish a large portion of this article .. OK?

look for it on 360boom very soon ..

Cheers + happy weekend to you


M.L. Gallagher said...

As always Mark -- I'd be honoured.



Anonymous said...

Love you big as the moon, Louise.