Happiness is an inside job.

A strong positive mental attitude will create more miracles than any wonder drug. Patricia Neal

So what is the secret to happiness? There's gotta be one, right? I mean, it's not just that I don't deserve it, or do everything wrong, or that everyone else gets it, just not me. Right? Like, it's not me, it must be some secret nobody ever told me.

Sound familiar? Unfortunately for some, it might be. We think there's some mysterious secret being withheld. That some people have it encoded in their DNA while some, just don't get the right genes. And, if we're unhappy, it's not our fault. We didn't get the right molecular chart. We don't have what it takes to be happy.

Not!

Reality is, we all have what it takes to be 'happy'. There is no secret handshake, eye wink, potion that will give it to us. Happiness, like love, isn't to be bestowed upon us. It's to be experienced from the inside out -- and it's not weather dependent outside. It's an inside job.

There was a time in my life when I believed I would be happy if a man loved me for all I'm worth. I believed if I just found Mr. Right, my life would turn right side up and I would be deeply, profoundly happy.

I believed if everyone just 'did it my way', if they could just love me the way I needed, give me the emotional sustenance I deserved, I'd be happy and the world would spin gleefully on its axis without any bumps and grinds through space.

What I believe is not always reality. In fact, often, my beliefs limit my happiness and my ability to live the life of my dreams. Because, when what I believe is founded on my 'getting' from the world all that I need to be happy, I'm coming at the universe with a belief of scarcity, of lack of paucity. When I am needy, I may get what I want, but it will never be enough. Because happiness is an inside job and looking for it out there is inside out, upside down thinking.

Happiness begins with gratitude. Always has.

Awhile ago, I was waiting in a clinic to have some blood work done. A woman walked in, slim, grey haired, she leaned against her cane as she slowly walked to the desk, checked in and then turned and walk towards me. She sat down beside me, placed her large cloth bag on the floor beside her and proceeded to pull out her knitting. The wool was soft and fuzzy. A pretty deep rose colour flecked with a rainbow of colours. She saw me watching, smiled and her needles started to click.

"I'm making a sweater for my granddaughter. She's twelve. What an amazing girl." And the woman began to tell me about her life. About her seven grandkids (and I know I shouldn't but I do have favourites, she told me with a conspirational whisper).

She was widowed. "I miss him everyday but I feel so lucky to have such great memories to hold onto. I'm never lonely," she said and laughed. "He loved to tell jokes. I don't remember the jokes but I remember the laughter. He always said, 'The world is always a better place when we laugh.'"

I sat and listened and marvelled at her attitude. She was a ball of positivity. Of gratitude. Of appreciation.

Her name was called before mine. She tucked her knitting away in her bag, stood up slowly and said, "Thank you so much for listening to this old lady rattle on. I appreciate our conversation."

And she greeted the attendant with a smile and hello. "Thanks for seeing me so quickly," she said. The sound of their voices laughing echoed down the hall.

I know a man who at the bottom of his emails always writes, "I appreciate you."

A woman I sit on a committee with ends all her emails with a quote, "Try to make at least one person happy every day, and then in ten years you may have made three thousand, six hundred and fifty persons happy, or brightened a small town by your contribution to the fund of general enjoyment." Sidney Smith

Attitude is contagious. Make yours worth sharing.

If you're feeling sad, don't look for the world to pick you up. Ask yourself, what's something about the day I appreciate. And put your thoughts on your appreciation, not your dismay.

Last night, my daughters gave me a gift of appreciation. They bought me a pair of Lululemon shorts I've admired. It was an unexpected gift. It was in celebration of my 'cast' -- which meant, a celebration of me.

Their thoughtfulness and generosity touched my heart. It made me smile. I went to bed appreciating my life, grateful for the love and joy we share, thankful for my abundance. Connected to the circle of love that is my life.

In their thoughtful sharing, they created a sea of goodwill, and in turn, we all got to feel good too!
Now, it doesn't require a 'tangible' to create goodwill. In fact, it's not the shorts that made me feel so good. It was the knowledge that they had put thought into what they would give me, that they wanted to 'appreciate' me. Balm to a mother's heart. Joy to her spirit. :)

I am grateful for my daughters. They are kind and caring. Joyful and loving. They share their love and spirits generously, they give love constantly. And in their giving, I receive the gift of love that never ends. The gift that is infinite and eternal.

In giving, love, gifts, words of encouragement, of endearment, of support, of gratitude we create a world of goodwill. When we extend tender hands, gentle touch and helping hands, we lift ourselves up to our highest good and create a world of goodness around us.

Today, I invite you to focus on appreciating the people in your life. Think of five or six people you know and then write down one or two things about them you really appreciate. Now go tell them. If they aren't 'accessible' to you easily, write them a card and mail it off. Let your appreciation get out into the universe. Share your love. If we all do this for a week, we could affect the lightness of our world.

Share your gratitude today. Open your heart and let your love flow. You'll be happy you did!

Nameste.

The question is: What are you waiting for?