Monday, July 19, 2010

Turning away from nothing

When we tug at a single thing in nature, we find it attached to the rest of the world. John Muir
Turning away
from nothing,
I fall
into all
that I can be.

It is the thought that drifted through my morning meditation. Turning away, I find myself where ever I am in the nothing that I fear when I surrender myself to being my most authentic self.

In that moment, I become all of me without reservation, without fear, without conditions.

As I have been consciously creating a generative base from which I turn up in my life in faith, I have discovered this place deep within me that distrusts the very thing I desire -- turning up in faith.

What a fascinating conundrum!

That which I am actively engaged in creating is that which I fear -- a leap of faith.

Not faith in God as in my Catholic roots, but faith that Life, in all its exciting and limitless possibilities, desires to express itself through me. That life and I are co-creating this exciting journey where my heart's desires manifest themselves in all that I do, all that I say, all that I see.

In this unwinding of a relationship that I cherish, I find myself acting out. I hurt and to ease my pain, I sometimes express myself in ways that speak of my fear and disappointment, not my belief that Life is delivering to me limitless opportunities to create all that I desire in my life. How I turn up in challenging situations is a reflection of my belief -- in myself, in life, in others, in Love.

My beliefs create my experiences. And, because I lack faith in the goodness of life, I have created situations where I can prove my most powerful beliefs true -- that the world is full of lack, of limited expression of the goodness of life!

In recognizing that I am a woman who has operated from a 'faithless in the goodness of Life' modus of control, I liberate myself to take that leap of faith where I celebrate with Life all that is good, all that is great, all that is beautiful in the world around me.

As I liberate myself to express the beauty and wonder of the world around me and the world within me, I free up space for Life to express itself through me in Divine wonder.

These are not challenging times. These are times to dance in the rain, to wonder at the beauty of raindrops sparkling on a leaf, to marvel at the beauty of a worm edging its way across the lawn.

These are days of wonder when I turn away from nothing and surrender to fall in Love.



Maureen said...

Might we not acknowledge and work on the challenges even as we dance in the rain?

M.L. Gallagher said...

What a lovely and gentle thought Maureen! Thank you.

Anonymous said...

sometimes, when we struggle very hard without success to find a solution - if we just relax and stop pushing so hard toward that elusive goal, we find we are - right here where we are - the solution, ourselves, by ourselves, for ourselves ... just being ourselves

I do wish you the peace you seek ... and suggest it might not be hidden in some far away grail, but simply standing in the shoes you wear



M.L. Gallagher said...

I am always fascinated when someone's interpretation of what I write reveals where they are at -- which is so amazing!

Thanks Mark -- I love the shoes where I'm at. Today, I am joyful and not seeking to be anywhere other than right where I am at.



Anonymous said...

howdy louise!

interesting thoughts.

my thoughts this morning as i was half awake was about the people in my family line that came before me.
one in paticular named america jane, who was left on a church door step in kentucky and taken in by the people of my family, and she stepped in and continued the line to me. i suppose she had no clue as to her family line in blood. i was just trying to imagine her, and others on the tree of the past, what they were like, their life, thoughts, dress, etc. i think that it was the pirot movie last night with all the costumes of the past.

M.L. Gallagher said...

What a powerful family line nAncY!

And what an amazing story.

Joseph Campbell has a lot of exercises on 'family lines' and how to access our psychic history. Very cool stuff!

And don't you just love those costumes? :)

Red Letter Believers said...

Isn't amazing how we cling to nothingness, like it's our best friend? Strange humans!


katdish said...

This is going to sound terribly cliche', but I don't care.

Your writing speaks to me. I wonder if what I'm interpreting thru your writing is the same as what you are meaning when you are writing it. But in the end, it doesn't really matter, because in good writing, we are given the gift of weaving our own story into another's gift of expressing theirs.

M.L. Gallagher said...

Kat -- I love that my writing speaks to you -- as Glynn so beautifully wrote yesterday morning in his list of why he writes -- "I write to tell a story, to help others see what I see, to see what others see." --

And when we see into each other, we are richer.

thanks for seeing into me and letting me see into the wonder of you!

L.L. Barkat said...

Oh... I hope you post the poem you left in my comment box and leave the link in the linky thing. It was truly marvelous and I want others to see (sometimes they breeze past the comments, but yours invites a good linger :)

Joyce Wycoff said...

Louise, we tugged at two different threads of the same cloth. Thank you for helping me catch something that was eluding me.

Your opening quote is so perfect ... we are all attached.

Sandra Heska King said...

Turning away. Turning up.

This reminded me of the Shaker hymn I love so much.

To turn, turn, will be our delight
Til by turning, turning we come round right.

I love your writing.

Kathleen Overby said...

Remember my beautiful friend, Real Love is about how the Lover decides and chooses to love. It doesn't all depend on you, the Lovee. Isn't that a relief? :) Hugs. Receive. Relax. Relinquish. Relish. are it seems.