One of my father's favourite quotes when I was a little girl was, "You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink."
Yesterday, thinking about a situation with someone I love and my hesitation to intervene when I knew what they were engaging in was hurting them, that quote came to mind.
What's behind the message, I asked myself.
What's buried in my psyche?
What's the limiting belief?
And then it struck me -- beneath the 'here, let me show you the water. you decide whether or not you drink' is the belief -- I am helpless to affect someone else's behaviour.
I think that's what they call. Bullsh*t!
I can't change what other's do but I am not powerless.
I have a voice.
I have the capacity to use it. To speak up and be heard.
Yet, I let the belief that I can't make someone drink the water keep me from even leading them to the well.
Because the limiting belief is -- what's the point?
It's not my business. It's not up to me to intervene.
Actually. It is.
When I see someone doing something that hurts them, it is not up to me to walk away. It's up to me to step in and intervene -- at least to say something so that they know I see them. I hear them. I feel for them -- and love them.
Love is not inactive.
It is constantly in action. In motion. In doing.
Love is.
It's me who isn't always present to doing what I must to create a world of love -- a world where I don't stand on the sidelines watching someone hurt themselves, or watching someone destroy another, or watching people hurt each other or the world around them.
I may not be able to change the world but I sure can change what I do in it to create well-being all around me. And when I see someone hurting, I have the power to step in and ask, "I see your pain. How can I be of service?"
So dad, I know you're gone from this world but I just wanted you to know, I get it. It isn't about leading anyone to water or forcing them to drink. It is about what I do to create opportunities for them to see and know and feel that we are all connected. We are all in this ocean of life together. We are all drinking of the same well of Love. And if the water isn't sweet, I do have the power to pour my voice into its depths and let it rise up in a song of Love.
Namaste.
7 comments:
That was a saying I heard as a child, too. I appreciate what you've shared.
oh yes! This is a saying that is very big in our Change Management team at the moment as we seek to change the culture and the way things have been done in our company for 25 years.
I love your way of looking at it and agree wholeheartedly (I think along your lines in terms of my sons)
i like songs of love...
Thank you Susan -- I am always in awe of how we can connect through words heard from childhood resonating today.
How wonderful to be in sync with you Fi -- and it is powerful isn't it, to know we can't force but we do have a voice to lovingly share what we know.
Nance -- you always make me smile.
i share your views. if we see someone dying of thirst and we can see the pool of water why wont we show them the way and maybe insist a bit that they take some sips and decide whats best for them.
you have a beautiful heart louise.
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