Monday, April 2, 2012

Diving In!

Rain is falling this morning. Soft. Misty. Magical.

And I am at peace, in love, in tranquility.

Perhaps it's the Island air. Perhaps just the fact I am beside the ocean. Doesn't matter why. That is how I feel. At peace. In Love.

I am on Gabriola Island -- a little bit of paradise on earth -- and finding myself intrigued, and scared by the course I'm taking. I'm used to being 'in charge'. Or at least, having a purpose that doesn't entail me doing the work, but rather guiding others to do the work.

Being the student means being open to whatever happens. Last night, as I drove home to my sister's house from The Haven, the retreat centre where the Come Alive course takes place, I let the resistance inside me rise up and scream itself out into the night.

Seriously! Why do I want to keep digging. keep unravelling the mystery that is me? Isn't enough enough?

Truth is, I am always enough.

Truth is also.... if better is possible, is good good enough.

Being here, doing this coursework isn't about making myself better. It's about opening myself up further to the wonder and beauty and mystery and possibility of my life.

It means diving deep into my internal landscape to unlock those hidden caverns where my magnificence hides out in voices of self-doubt and hesitation.

It means, unleashing all of me so that I can truly live freely in the rapture and wonder of this moment, right now where I am alive, and living life fearlessly, passionately and completely free.

I am diving in this morning. Delving deeper and coming up for air, breathing freely of the beauty and wonder and joy of being me in a world full of mystery and magic. In a world where I am open to the miracles happening all around me.

Yeah. I may know resistance, but my will and desire to live my life open and free draw me into courage to move beyond my fear into life, right now, right now, breathing deeply of the sea air because this is my one precious life to live. And how I do it is up to me.

Let me do it in total Love with me, my life and everyone in it!



S. Etole said...

The last photo speaks volumes.

Annabelle said...

Looks and sounds beautiful! I hope it's everything that you're looking for.