It's Up To Me!

Once upon a time I fell in love with a dream. Well, actually, I thought I fell in love with a man, but he turned out to be a myth, and my life became a nightmare. But that’s a whole other story about a whole other lifetime ago! (You can read about it in The Dandelion Spirit. A true life fairy tale of love, lies and letting go.

Today, my life is amazing. Not because a man made my dreams come true! My life is amazing because I am living my life to the fullest, working on making my own dreams come true and stepping with grace and dignity through each moment. Even on those days when I feel like I’m bumping into furniture or moving at a snail’s pace, I feel alive. I breathe freely and know that this is my one and only life. And only I can live it to the fullest.

In the nightmare where I fell in love with the man of my dreams, I saw myself as an amazing, vibrant, incredible woman. I was loved. I was fulfilled. I lived life to the fullest, every day a painter’s palate of wondrous colour and design. Now, in the beginning, I thought I could only have this amazing life if I had the man who said he would make my dreams true. I thought if he stood in front of me, he would shield me from the winds of life, and if he waved his magic wand, all the sweet nothings he whispered into my ears would become the stuff that dreams were made of. Alas, he was a mirage. Even though, I tried for the longest time to make him real, to make the dream of him come true, I just couldn’t do it. Truth is, he was never capable of being anything other than who he was.

But one thing was true. The reflection of me I saw in his eyes, that was my reflection, that was me! I just couldn’t see it until I awoke to the wonder and joy of living my life in the moment, without fear of ever being anyone other than who I am. An amazing, vibrant, incredible woman capable of making her own dreams come true by living passionately and fearlessly, every moment of every day.

In my reality today, my dreams are of my making. That man long ago was never able to make my dreams come true because, a dream is not like a fridge. You can’t just plug dreams in and expect them to start humming. Nor can you wave a magic wand and whisper empty incantations into the sunset on a wing and a prayer in the hopes it will all work out okay, somehow, somewhere.

To make a dream come true, you need to work at it. Believe in it. Live it. You need to breathe it, smell it, be it. When I met the man of my dreams, I put my future in his hands, and waited with baited breath for what he would do to make it all come true.

That just wasn’t right! I abdicated responsibility for my own life. I let go of my power and tried to plug into someone else’s battery. Today, I am ABLE to succeed because, I ACCEPT that I am responsible for me and my own life. When I take responsibility for everything I do, say and create, I act with integrity – what’s good for me is only good for me if no one else is harmed. I BELIEVE in me and BEGIN with reachable and realistic goals and LIST the steps I need to take to attain those goals and work my plan and work my plan and work my plan. And, I EVALUATE what’s working for me and ELIMINATE those things that create less of what I want so that I can focus on creating more of what I want in my life.

Ultimately, no man, no person, nor even animal can determine my life. No one else can say what’s real or isn’t real for me. No one else can make my life happen. No one else can make me fail or succeed. No one else has the power to make my dreams come true, because, it’s up to me. And I'm worth it!